I feel the same way about my two year-old daughter and door knobs.
Wait: In this analogy am I comparing my lovely, wonderful two year-old daughter with the dangerous regime currently in power in North Korea? Yes. (While my daughter has a much better human rights record, North Korea has never dropped a book on my foot because I refused to read it despite being asked to do so 37 times in a two-minute span.)
And am I comparing the possibility of nuclear missiles with the ability to operate a door knob? Yes. Sometimes I just want ten seconds of privacy.
Does this make me a bad father? Yes. But I still don't want her to learn how to open a door.
I know that eventually she will learn how to operate them, but for now I think it is best to keep my daughter's hands off of the door knob technology. Literally. There are two main reasons for this:
1. Door knobs help keep her out. As long as she doesn't know how to use a door knob, I can keep her out of places simply by shutting a door. I can keep her out of the closet, so she doesn't rummage through everything. I can keep her out of her brother and sister's room, so she doesn't steal/misplace/mangle/destroy their things. (And so when their things do get stolen/misplaced/mangled/destroyed, they can't blame their little sister.) And, most importantly, I can keep her out of the bathroom so I can actually have five minutes of peace to go poop! (And by "five minutes of peace" I mean five minutes of her pounding on the door while yelling "Daddy!")
One thing I could do is actively teach her to not use door knobs. I could say things like, "Don't touch that door knob, it's poisonous!" or "If you touch that door knob you'll have bad dreams!" Or I could rig it so she gets an electric shock every time she touches the door knob. Will I actually do any of those things? Probably not. (But that's not to say I'm not tempted.)
|I think MC Hammer put it best when he said, "Don't touch that!"|
Yes, I know that one day she will eventually figure out the door knob technology. But until she does, I certainly won't be encouraging it.
It's like they used to say on SportsCenter, "You can't stop her, you can only hope to contain her."