Saturday, January 22, 2011

The Law of Roommate Undressedness

I am not allowed to walk around the house in my underwear. (This is probably a good thing.) The Wife, on the other hand, is allowed to stroll through the home in her underwear without any repercussions. Double standard? Not really. It's just the Law of Roommate Undressedness.

You see, what I have going against me is the fact that The Wife's sister, Kimmie, lives in our basement apartment. The basement has its own door, but it's not always accessible in the winter. Plus, the apartment isn't totally separate: we share the washer/dryer area and the downstairs family room with her. So, basically, she is our roommate, and it is perfectly feasible for her to be walking around in our house at any time of the day or night. And thus, no moseying about in my scivvies for me.

Conversely, according to the Law of Roommate Undressedness, the same is true for Kimmie. She can't wander around in her underwear either, because she would never know when I might be lurking about. (Honestly, I don't lurk.) (At least not on purpose.)

The Wife, however, is immune to all of this. As my wife and Kimmie's sister, she is free to roam about in her underwear willy-nilly. (And she occasionally does.)

Of course, if it were my brother living in the basement, the tables would be turned. The Wife would be stuck in her pajamas and/or sweats, while I would be free to prance around in my underwear. (Well, maybe not prance.)

The Law of Roommate Undressedness is a bit more vague when the roommate is an opposite gender sibling. It all depends on comfortableness level and age. Right now, my daughter and son take baths together, but that will only last for another year or two. At what age should opposite gender siblings not see each other in their underwear? 5? 8? 12? 16?

Personally, although I would be more comfortable in my underwear around my sister than around almost any other woman, if she lived in our basement I would still clothe myself before walking around. (You're safe, Lynette.)

Of course, most roommates are not siblings. In theses cases the Law of Roommate Undressedness depends almost completely on comfortableness level. How comfortable are you around that person in your underwear?

I think, in general, women are more likely to walk around in their undies around other women than men are around other men. In my personal experience with roommates in college, underwear was rarely seen, with the occasional exception of emergency dashes to the bathroom.

Women, on the other hand, like prancing around wearing nothing but their bras and panties with their female roommates. Or at least that's what I've learned from movies like Animal House. (Animal House was based on a true story, wasn't it?)

(Truthfully, like most other things about women, I have absolutely no clue what exactly it is they do, or why they do it.)

[Disclaimer: As discussed here, the Law of Roommate Undressedness applies only to heterosexual roommates. (I am not going to be responsible for setting dress codes for homosexual roommates.)]

So, that's about all I have to say about the Law of Roommate Undressedness. I guess I'll just sit here with my clothes on for the rest of the day. (Unless Kimmie has gone away for the weekend again. If so, let the prancing begin!)

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